Should I Just Understand That He Has A Life Aside From Me?
April 15, 2009
So me(15) and my boyfriend(17) been going out for 5 months now. We have a great communication and we trust each other 100% but most important we love each other. Last week he told me that he needed to talk to me and so we did.
He wanted to talk about the summer and about how busy he is going to be. He said that in the summer he will barely have time for himself because he needs to work with his dad. He is worried about putting our relationship at risk because in his past relationships that was always a big problem that almost caused his relationships to end.
I told him that is ok that I understand and that I’m going to try to keep myself busy too so that I wont worry about it so much. The thing is that even though I understand now, I know that when the time comes and I want to chill with him over the summer without being able to it is going to cause problems. I love spending time with him and is going to be hard for me to not see him as much as I’m used to then when we have no school.
What should I do?
Catrina, 15
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Dear Catrina,
I think the sentence that says it all is what you wrote:
“We have a great communication and we trust each other 100% but most important we love each other.”
That is truly something special and rare that is hard to come by. Sometimes when you love someone you have to think of them and not just yourself and what you want. Yes, there are going to be times when you wish he wasn’t busy so that you could hang out with him more, but you have to realize that he wants the same thing, but he is just not able to.
Try to think of it in a good way. Have you ever heard the saying absence makes the heart grow fonder? It really is true! You will look forward to seeing him and appreciate him so much more when you only get to see him limited times. So I think you have the right idea of finding your own stuff to stay busy with so that your not siting around waiting for him to have time for you…that would be no fun.
He obviously wants your relationship to work and doesn’t want this summer job to ruin what you have. So show him that your relationship is strong enough to last through this summer and that you are willing to make it work as much as him.
His past relationships were obviously not strong enough, so show him that what you guys have is special and is not like his last relationships…it is real love that can handle anything!
This will make your relationship even stronger and he will love you even more for being so understanding and making the best of the situation.
One Comment, Comment or Ping
So
Ommg this advice is great!! I feel a bit the same way because my boyfriend lives far away so we don\’t go at the same school and so we only see each other the weekend.
But thanks !:)
May 29th, 2009
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