What Do I Do If My Boyfriend Dumped Me On A Note?
September 25, 2009
Dear Katie,
I really really like this guy and we were practically brother and sister until two months ago when I asked him out & he said, “It was bound to happen lets try…us” and he dumped me in a note during school half a week before his birthday (May 1st). It was terrible but I figured I might ask him out next grade, when he was a bit more mature & could handle drama. Until my best friend declares me of being jealous of my crush talking to her all the time & sitting with her in every class.
Then my best friend and my crush played a cruel joke on me and took it way to far! They pretended to date and she fooled me once in school and then pulled it again after school. It was so rude! And my crush was in on the joke! I don’t know if it’s just his way of hiding his feelings or if he really just thinks of me as a friend! Help me I think I might be in love with this guy!
Meg, 12 (almost 13)
Dear Meg,
First of all, he should not have dumped you on a note, and secondly that joke he and your friend played was pretty immature. It’s hard to tell WHY this guy is playing games, but he seems to have a pattern of doing so. He IS young so he’s probably just immature and doesn’t know how to treat a girl. Don’t take it personally that he is acting this way, it has nothing to do with you not being good enough for him or anything. In reality, he might not be good enough for you (right now). Since girls DO mature faster than guys, you are just ready to take your friendship to a new level that he is not emotionally ready to handle.
You can probably expect him to handle situations just as poorly if you were to start dating him. Ask yourself if that is what you really want right now. Is he going to add to your life or just bring you down and make you feel sad and confused. I know it seems like love to you right now, but it is most likely not the true meaningful kind of love that is possible. It’s easy to confuse love with the feelings you get when a guys are unattainable. I liked this guy before and we dated for a short time and he ended up breaking up with me. I still liked him for SO long and thought it must be love since I still liked him so much. But looking back I realize now that it had nothing to do with REAL love, it was really just an infactuation. I had never been dumped and the fact that he broke up with me, made me want him even more. Sounds kinda lame but it happens to girls ALL the time. I think your feelings have built up over time and it is more of an infactuation. You just are feeling that you like this guy because he isn’t reciprocating what you want him to.
But either way, if it is love or not love it doesn’t really matter. What matters is that this guy is immature and not worthy of you or your time right now. Try to laugh off their little prank and don’t get too upset over it. Be glad that you are not that type of person that would do something like that to your friend. And yes, I do think that it was a really immature and mean joke, but don’t let it get you down. They were trying to make you jealous so don’t give them that satisfaction by showing them that their prank worked. Don’t let them see that it bothered you. They will see that you don’t care that they are “going out” and will soon quit pretending because they didn’t get the reaction from you they wanted.
2 Comments, Comment or Ping
Meg
we were just friends up until this year when i simply asked him if he liked one of my friends (considering that hes in full on flirt mode with her) and he tottaly wiged out on me!! and now atleast a month later hes still mad at me and now as of wednesday were officially Ex- Best Friends!!!! he dosnt even want me in his life anymore! I heard him say it himself in a 3 way call attack (me being the eavsdropper) i know it was wrong but it had to be done.he didnt say it in those exact words but it was implied and he had never sounded more serious in all of his 12 years! so i told him to have a nice life without me. and then thursday and friday at lunch (we usually sit with the same ppl) but i sat further away with my other friend who im not really that close to while he sat with my BEST FRIEND!!!!practically my sister (who he never got along with before) and all i heard all lunch was him calling her name…”victoria!” “hey vicky?”!!!!! im so annoyed!!!! should i just play along like it dosnt bother me even though it does?!
Oct 17th, 2009
Katie
Dear Meg,
He is trying to get a reaction out of you. If you act annoyed and bothered he is just going to continue to do it. Don\’t sit any where near him during lunch so you wont have to put up with it (Meaning outside of listening range where you wont be able to hear him).
If he comes near you, walk away. You have a choice in this situation. You dont have to hang around and let him get the best of you. After a while when he sees you are not around to bother anymore eventually he will give up and forget all about the tension.
xoxo
Katie
Oct 30th, 2009
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