I Like Two Guys Who Are Friends!

Comments (4)
November 2, 2008

Okay, I just began 6th grade like 12 weeks ago. Everything has changed! It’s totally different! So I have a question about these two guys that I like. Okay, one guy’s name is Jordan. He’s really cute and super sweet and he’s also like my best friend. Well I’ve been out with him a few times and I was the one always breaking up with him.

Well Jordan has a friend named Alex. Alex is on the same travel team as Jordan. The afternoon at school before the dance, I broke up with Jordan because I knew that his friend Alex liked me and I really liked him too. Alex told me that he did but he said it was okay if I didn’t like him back because I was going out with Jordan. So that’s why I broke up with him.

But I rather just have broken up with Jordan than cheating on him because I would NEVER do that! So when I got to the dance with my friends, I saw Alex and Jordan fighting. They were like cussing each other out and all this mess. But they were not “physically” fighting. Anyway, I told Jordan that I was sorry but it’s really not worth fighting for. Well a few minutes before it was over, Alex asked me out. And I said yes. I felt kind of stupid when I said yes because I really didn’t know him that well because it was at the beginning of the school year.

Well we never really talked to each other. A few times he would call me on the phone and I would have NOTHING to say. It was so embarrassing! I had to make up something every time I called just so I could get off the phone because it was just so awkward! Well even though I broke up with Jordan, he’s still my best friend. So I called him for advice because he knew Alex more than I did at the time. Well then I’ve just been talking to Jordan on the phone a lot for advice but I never seemed to have the courage enough to call him back and have a conversation with him.

Well now, it’s been 9 weeks and Alex broke up with me about a month ago because he thought that I was cheating on him with Jordan- since I was on the phone with him so much. So, I really still like Alex. ALOT. Yesterday, Jordan came over with a bunch of friends and me to go trick-or-treating with us. And every single time I’m with Alex or Jordan alone, I seem to like them more and more. I can’t help but to flirt with both of them.

So now, I am going out with Jordan again. I know what you are thinking; she has too many of the same boyfriends! I know, I know. But I don’t know why I keep saying yes to Jordan when I still have a lot of feelings left for Alex. A few weeks ago, Alex told me that he still liked me and I told him that I still liked him too. (That is not when I’m going out w/ Jordan.) Well, ever since that- me and Alex keep flirting and everybody says that he is going to ask me out- even Jordan.

So now that I’m going out with Jordan, and me and Alex still have feeling for each other, what do I do? Do I break up with Jordan? Do I tell both of them how I feel?

I NEED YOUR ADVICE. QUICKLY. PLEASE HELP ME.” ~ Katlin

Dear Katlin,

When it comes to boys one thing I have come to find is that no good comes from dating boys who are friends with each other. When you date guys who are friends….it almost always turns into drama. Especially if you date them back to back! You know how girls talk to each other…guys are just as bad and they gossip about girls all the time!
The only time dating guys who are friends is not so tricky is when a lot of time has gone by and feelings have faded between you and your ex.

It is not fair to either one of them to keep changing your mind and switching back and forth. You have already left Jordan once for Alex…..if you do it again you may destroy your friendship with Jordan for good. So if you want to break up with Jordan, do it because you don’t want to be with him anymore…not because you want to be with Alex instead. If after a couple of months go by and you still have feelings for Alex then it might be ok to start dating him. So don’t break up with a guy for another guy….

If you cherish Jordan’s friendship and feelings, you wont break up with him just cause you like Alex again.
Think of how you would want to be treated if the roles were reversed and Jordan liked your friend…How would you feel if he broke up with you twice to date your friend? It wouldn’t feel so good would it? You would probably lose all trust and respect for him.

Remember that these guys have feelings too and to take their feelings into consideration before you keep dumping them for each other. So either give Jordan a chance, or if you break up with him, wait a while before you start dating Alex again. Give Jordan and yourself time to get over the breakup before you get back with Alex.

xoxo

Katie

4 Comments, Comment or Ping

Katlin

Thanks Katie. That really helped alot.

So, do you think it would be best to still keep going out with Jordan?

Nov 3rd, 2008
Katie

Hi Katlin,

You should continue going out with Jordan ONLY if you still have feelings for him in that way. If you still like him a lot, then sure you should continue to date him.

But if he feels more like a friend then just keep him as a friend….but if you do dump him, dont go dating Alex right away. Wait until time has past and Jordan has gotten over you breaking up with him.

Nov 3rd, 2008
Alyssa

i really like this guy. He broke up with me a few weeks ago and i really want to go back out with him again what should i do???

Dec 2nd, 2008
admin

Hi Alyssa,

Since he broke up with you, there is really nothing you can do to make him change the way he feels. If he is adimit about his decision then you should try to start getting over him as fast as possible and moving on to date guys who share the same feelings for you.

Sometimes when we like someone who doesn’t like us back, it is easy to want them more because we can’t have them. So be careful not to continue chasing this guy who is no longer interested in you…it is not fun in the long run, and you may end up getting more hurt.

xoxo

Katie

Jan 6th, 2009