Dear Katie,

I like this boy…a lot. He acts like he likes me…a lot. He walks me home from the bus a lot. He is shy. Not when he walks me home but when we are talking at school. I don’t know why.

I say hi to him and he says hi and then turns to talk to someone else. I do not know what is going on when he does that. But then he is so sweet when he walks me home. I don’t know if I should ask him out or if I should just let it stay a friendship. I don’t want it to get awkward between us, so I don’t know what to do.

Sarah, 13

Dear Sarah,

Some guys are just better one on one then when they are with a group of their friends or people. It sounds like he is more himself when he is just one on one with you walking home from the bus.
You wanna know if you should ask him out or not. I think it may be a little too soon to ask him out since you are not really sure of how he feels. If you do ask him out, just be prepared for if he doesn’t share your feelings. Like you said, things can get awkward, so wait a little longer to see if he shows any signs that he likes you back.

If I were you, I would remain friends and occasionlly flirt with him and hint at liking him and find reasons to hang out with him more. This would help set up opportunities for him to ask me out and for him to flirt back too if he likes me.

So suggest to him that you really wanna see a new movie playing or that you wanna learn a new video game he plays or something. See if he suggests you guys see the movie together or if he offers to teach you the game. This way you are not putting him on the spot by asking straight out if he likes you back. You are giving him a chance to show you that he is interested without having to come out and say it.

Hi Katie,

This guy likes me and I like him a little bit too, but he goes to a different school and lives two towns away from me. I haven’t seen him in two years, but we are really good friends on MSN.
I am planning to meet up with him again with a few friends of mine.

He knows I liked him before, but he doesn’t know I still do. He told me he has given up trying to get me to like him. I think this means he is trying to stop liking me (Correct me if I’m wrong).

I don’t know what I should do, because my friend says I should tell him that I still like him…I agree but if we go out I would never see him because he is so far away. What do you think I should do?

Thanks!

Becca, 14

Dear Becca,

I agree with your friend, you should tell him you still like him! Just because it can’t go anywhere right now doesn’t mean in the future you wont be able to date or live closer. You are 14 now, but in a couple of years you will be driving and two villages away wont seem like very far at all!

Think about it this way, if you don’t tell him, you are going to always wish you had and wonder what would have happened. So don’t worry about the distance or what will happen, just tell him that you still like him and go with the flow. You really never know what will happen or how it will turn out!

Hey Katie,

I don’t know if I like my boyfriend anymore. When I’m with him and we are hanging out with other people I feel awkward and embarrassed and I’m not sure why.

I also feel like I can’t look him in the eye when I talk to him now. I was fine before and could look him in the eye before we started goin out. But now he makes me uncomfortable. I thought I wanted to go further with him but not as far as sex or anything like that, just a bit more than kissing, any ideas? please help!

Rach

Dear Rach,

Sounds like you don’t really like him. If you liked him you wouldn’t feel awkward or embarassed. You will feel good when you are with him and be able to look him in the eye.
You also wanted to know if you should go further with him, but you are definitly not ready for that. If you don’t even like to look him in the eye, you shouldn’t even be with him. Trust me, it’s not going to get any better, and you are only going to like him even less.
Move on sweetie! This guy is not the right guy for you! Find a guy that makes you feel happy to be with.

Hi Katie,

This guy told me he liked me, and a couple days later he was over me. Doesn’t text me, or even look at me at school. This happened a few times before with him, then he tells me he likes me. Should I just get over him?

Sierra, 14

Dear Sierra,

You say this guy keeps telling you he likes you and then acting like he doesn’t. Hes done it several times so there is definetly a patern developing. He may be trying to see your reaction to see if you like him too. When he says he likes you, and doesn’t get the reaction out of you he was expecting, like you saying you like him too…he might be withdrawing from you out of embarassment. Then later he gets the nerve again to tell you and the same thing happens again.

The thing is, we can speculate all day on why he might be doing this, but what is comes down to is what do you want? Do you want him to stop and leave you alone? Or do you like the fact that he likes you?

If you are annoyed with his behavior and just want him to stop telling you these things, you may want to forget about this guy. But if you really like him, next time he tells you he likes you, you should tell him how you feel too! This might be just what he is waiting to hear.

Hey Katie,
I have been a vegetarian for a month and a week now. My family thinks its fine, their totally supporting me. But I’m the only one in my family who is a vegetarian. I’ve tried to persuade them, but they keep saying it’s not for me and all that stuff. So I’m ok with that now, since it’s their choice.

My actual question is that I’ve been dieting and not eating any junk food for a month now. And I plan on still doing it. And I’ve been doing vigorous exercises. All this is to lose weight. I’m 107 right now. I plan on going to 95.

My parents have found out I was on this diet, and they keep telling me I can get hurt, I know I can but I know my extremes. I don’t know if I should listen to them or do my own thing? Any help?

Andrea, 13

Dear Andrea,

Being a vegetarian is a perfectly fine decision to make if that’s what you want to do. Like you said, it’s a personal choice and you can’t convince your friends to want to become vegetarians too. But it sounds like you are becoming a vegetarian to lose weight too.

It’s really easy to start dieting and just want to lose a few pounds and then lose control and obsess over it. A simple diet can become a strict diet where you count every calorie and gram of fat in your food until suddenly that’s all you think about. So just be cautious and aware of what can happen, and that it is very hard to stop once you start thinking about food in this way.

My suggestion to you is if you want to be vegetarian, do it for health reasons, such as you want to be healthy and eat nutritious food. Don’t do it to lose pounds on the scale. The scale does not measure how healthy you are and it is easy to get attached to those numbers and not see that you are risking your health to be a few pounds lighter. If you are focusing on giving your body what it needs, no more and no less, then your body will find its healthy weight on its own.

Many friends of mine have had issues with food and dieting and have had obscured views of what they should and shouldn’t eat, and all of them who have gotten past it have all said they are much happier with their bodies when they aren’t trying count every calorie.

The truth is, if you starve your body, your metabolism will slow way down and you will gain weight more easily because your body wants to hold onto every calorie it can get! This is bad and in the long run you can end up becoming over weight because your body is storing food that it would normally burn because it is afraid of starving itself.

Realize that curves on a woman are beautiful and give her a womanly shape. Guys like this! Guys don’t like girls that are twigs and look like skeletons. So try not to look at your scale to determine what weight you should be…look in the mirror to see how your body proportions look.

And keep in mind that at your age of 14 you are at a vital time for developing into a woman and if you restrict yourself too much on this diet you may end up stunting your growth and not develop properly (i.e. your height and breasts). So give your body a chance to develop properly. Vegetables and exercise are great and healthy choices, just remember to nourish your body, and don’t deprive it.

Hi Katie,

I havn’t had my period yet, what should I do?

Brittney, 12

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Dear Brittney,

You are twelve and are worried that you havn’t had your period. You are not alone! Many twelve year old girls are wondering when they are going to start theirs. But the truth is, most girls don’t start their period until they are 13 or 14, sometimes even 15!

So don’t worry you are perfectly fine, you will get it in the next few years. I didn’t get mine until after I was 14 and I remember wondering if I would ever get it! It felt like all my friends were getting theirs, and I still hadn’t.

So try to be patient, and don’t compare yourself to your friends who might be getting theirs before you. It means nothing that you start early or late, it’s just that your DNA is different than your friends.

You will still develop into a woman just as they will…at your own pace and in your own time.

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Hi Katie,

Me and this guy both like each other and we want to go out but my bestfriend doesn’t want me to… she should be more understanding but the thing is she likes him too!

What should I do? Who should I pick, bestfriend or boyfriend?

~Zaiah, 13

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Dear Zaiah,

Well thats not really cool of your bestfriend to put you in that situation to where you would have to chose between her or him.

If the guy is obviously into you and not your friend, then there is really no reason for you not to date him. Just because your friend is jealous and disappointed that he doesn’t like her is not a good enough reason to not date him. If she is truley your best friend she will want what is best for you and what makes you happy.

Give her a week or two and she will get over it…she just got her ego hurt a little! So try not to rub it in that he picked you and not her. Be understanding and try to remember she just got rejected.

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Dear Girl Talk,

I’m in a bit of a mess, theres rumours going round school about how I have ‘hairy armpits’ and stuff.

Truth is i dont know how to get rid of it.

~Tamsin, 15

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Dear Tamsin,

The way to get rid of hairy underarms is SUPER easy! Just buy a razor and when you are in the shower shave your entire underarm! You are at the age where you should start making this part of your daily hygine routine…cause girl, hairy arm pits are definetly not sexy!

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“How can I feel pretty when I’m just so ugly?

I go to an all girl’s school and everybody there is skinny,athletic tall and really pretty.And I’m the complete opposite.

I’m short and ugly and flabby and no matter how hard i try i can’t lose weight.Everyone there has had multiple boyfriends and I haven’t even talked to a guy since primary school.if i had boobs it wouldn’t be as bad but everyone assumes that small boobs mean athletic body,except in my case. Can you Help? Thanks!

Emily, 13

Dear Emily,

Here is the thing, at your age, you think that the way you look now is the way you are going to look like forever, but that is so NOT true! I look much prettier now than when I was your age! Some girls talk longer to develop and find their best look. Looking back now at some of the girls I grew up with it is funny to see how they turned out now that we are in our twenties. Many of the girls who were skinny and pretty are now HUGE, and many of the girls that were a little chunky have now lost weight and look amazing!

Now is not the time for you to be focusing on guys anyway. You are in an all girls school so use your time to focus on other things that you are good at and have fun! I think you need some sort of theme or hobby in your life. Something that makes you feel good when you do it. Like a sport, or art, or dance, or music, or even find your own unique style! This will really help you develop a confidence in yourself and your abilities that aren’t based solely on your looks (which don’t last anyways)
Over time, as you start eating better and exercising a little and as time goes by, by the time you are in your twenties you will have lost weight the healthy way and feel great about your looks and your inner self.

So try not to look at your situation like your doomed because over time as you work on you positive attitude and inner confidence (based on things other than your looks) everyone gets old and loses their looks anyway, so why not develop your confidence based on something that will last forever!? So find something you are really good at and put your energy into that rather than worrying about your looks. If you keep comparing yourself to other girls, you will never feel good enough, because there will always be a girl out there that is a little better looking.

Ok please help me I don’t no what clothes to wear I don’t know what make up to use and I wanna loose a little bit of weight fast too, but I don’t know how!!!!!!!!!!

Please, please reply back asap!

Kristy, 14

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Dear Kristy,

Sounds like you are not happy with your current self appearance. Changing everything about your looks drastically may not make you feel better neccesarily. It’s not like you are going to go out tomorrow and buy all new clothes, makeup and loose weight and then feel really good about yourself. My guess, is that even if you did go do these things there would still be something that you felt you needed to feel more beautiful. However, I know that sometimes a girl can use a little change in her look to feel fresh again….so I can give you some general tips to use as guidelines for when you do buy new clothes and makeup and lose weight.

First, when it comes to clothes, there are so many different styles, and there isn’t necessarily one that is best. You have to find clothes that you feel good in…not just what is trendy at the moment. I have found that when I buy clothes just because they are the new trend, I end up only wearing them like once then they just sit in my closet. So take your time shopping and over time you will accumulate clothes that you really like and that you feel beautiful wearing.

Second, when it comes to makeup…you say you don’t know what makeup to wear. A great idea would be to go to a salon or makeup counter and get a makeup lesson. These women are pros that can match your features and colors with the proper makeup. I really wish I had done that when I was 14! I think it would have really helped me to learn how to do my makeup right.

Thirdly. about losing weight fast…sounds like there is something coming up that you are trying to look your best for and so you want to lose some weight. If you wanna loose weight fast and keep it off here is what you do. The only way to lose weight is to burn more calories than you consume. Go running everyday for at least 30 minutes to burn some extra calories. Also, watch your diet…this doesn’t mean to count every calorie, just try to eat healthy choices like fruits, vegetables, and lean proteins such as fish and chicken. If you stay active and don’t over indulge in food, you will lose weight in no time!

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Hey, I’m 12 and my parents hate it when I wear makeup but I never feel pretty without it and when I don’t have it on I feel self concsious.

I only wear compact powder and a little bit of natural coloured blush none of the colours are retro or anything their all natural and I wear the odd mascara even tho my folks don’t think I should I still do. And I feel bad but I cant help it do u think its ok or should I low down on the makeup I am in year 7 by the way so I am in high school if that makes a difference.

Jess, 12

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Dear Jess,

Your parents will ALWAYS think you are perfectly beautiful without any makeup and that you don’t need it. Mine are the same way! However, I can relate to what your saying, I feel much better about my looks when I have my makeup on than when I’m not wearing any. I didn’t start wearing makeup until I was 14, but I know girls are starting to wear it younger now at 12 and 13. It sounds like your makeup you are currently wearing is pretty natural and not overdone, which is great. You are on the right track. Your parents probably feel that you are too young to wear any, but they will have to accept the fact one day, as you grow up you are going to start wearing it at some point.

If your parents are really forbidding it and you will get in trouble for wearing it, then by all means DON’T wear it, I don’t want you to get into trouble. But, if they are somewhat flexible and just disapprove rather than forbid it…maybe you can ask your mom if you could get a makeup lesson to learn how to do your makeup the right way to enhance your looks rather than look like you are wearing makeup. Maybe your parents would be more open to something like this that way they know if you wear makeup it will look good. A lot of beauty salons offer this type of service.

You can also tell them that you know that they think your beautiful without it, but you really like how you look with it and that it makes you feel more confident with your looks. Be honest with them about your feeling insecure without it. If your mom wears makeup then she will be able to relate to what you are saying. Most women that wear makeup feel the EXACT same way as you do, and they feel prettier with makeup than without makeup. So your mom may understand best on how you feel and be able to see your point of view better if you talk to her openly about it.

Hope this helped! Good luck sweetie=)

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“Hi Katie,

There is a guy that me and my friend like and he asked me out in front of her.. and I found out that he broke up with his girlfriend to go out with me.

My friend says hes a jerk for doing that and his girlfriend was friends with my friend and she doesn’t want to talk to him anymore and we’re all good friends. What should I do??”

~Zaiah

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Dear Zaiah,

Well she is friends with the girl he broke up with, so I can see why she may think he is a jerk…plus she liked him and he asked YOU out instead…so of course she is not jumping for joy.

So try not to let her make you feel bad for dating him…as long as you are happy with him and he treats you well your friend will see that maybe he is an OK guy and start talking to him again. She is also probably looking out for you and doesn’t want him to do the same thing he did to her other friend, and dump you for someone else.

My advice to you is to proceed with caution with this guy, but be aware that your friend is just trying to be a friend to you and she may also be a little disappointed that he didn’t like her. So don’t be mad at her and when she doesn’t want to hang out or talk to this guy, try to understand her point of view and why she may not want to. When you hang out with her, just don’t bring him along or talk about him the whole time.

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“”I like this guy in all of my classes. But every single friend I have hates him. And people say he likes one of my friends who especially hates him. We talk a lot, and yesterday we were in a computer lab and he was next to me, and we were sitting really close because he was on my computer.

We were playing a game, and two guys came to us and were like, ‘Dude, you’re hitting on her!’ And he looked at them, then at me and didn’t say anything. I’ll look at him, then he’ll turn around to look at me. He helps me when I pretend not to understand things, and we have real conversations,We talk a lot, and even though were only in 8th grade, I think we could make a relationship work.

I want to get his number but I’m not sure how. Should I even try or not?”

~Taylor, 13

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Dear Taylor,

Sounds like you may want to get to know him better and hang out with him (away from your friends) in order to get to know him a better. Because then you will be able to see if your friends are just being judgemental or if there is a reason that they don’t all like him. Try not to pay attention to your friends not liking him…if you like him that is what really maters. (unless they hate him because he is mean to them, then you may want to look into why your friends feel the way they do, they might be warning you about him). But that doesn’t really sound like the case….I will leave that up to you to judge for yourself.

And about exchanging numbers…If you get his number…just stay FRIENDS for a while…don’t rush into any type of relationship or anything. You are thinking too far ahead about having a working relationship with him because you are still getting to know this guy. A relationship will happen in time if you and him end up both really liking each other. Plus what if you get to know him better and don’t really like him…it will be much easier to stop hanging out with him if you are just FRIENDS.

Being friends first will also make it MUCH easier for you to get his number and get to know him better because you are just hanging out as FRIENDS. Plus you could always give him your number if you are afraid to ask him for his. And when you get his number or give him yours have a reason to do so. For example if you guys were going to his house to play video games or something that he would do with a FRIEND it wont be awkward to exchange numbers.

Katie

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“Hi..this is my first time on here and i have been reading all the question but I’m not sure this one has been covered, well if it has I’m sorry! anyway, I need help I have two problems: How do shape your eyebrows??? I can’t do it!
Also thanks for the help of periods, i have realised that i will start soon, but you shouldn’t be in a hurry!! I’m getting there and some of my mates have started and i know i will I’m just smaller then them so i will be later!!
Lora, 13

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Dear Lora,

One of the best tips for shaping eyebrows is LESS IS MORE! I remember trying to pluck mine when I was about your age and I didn’t ask anyone how…I just kinda winged it! And I ended up plucking way more than I should have…which is VERY easy to do!

So be conservative in how much you pluck. It also depends on your natural eyebrows…do you have bushy ones or small ones? A good thing to do would be to go to a professional salon and have them shape them the first time for you (most hair salons or nail salons do this). Then after that you can just maintain them by plucking the stray hairs that grow back. I really wish I had done this before trying it on my own!

BUT if you would rather do it on your own…here are some basic guidelines of what you want to do. But please be very cautious because it is very easy to mess them up! Since eyebrows “frame” our eyes, they are an important feature of your face that enhance your eyes and can make them more bright and open.

Beginning of Eyebrow: Hold a pencil parallel to your nose,straight up-and-down and this will show you where the brow should begin. (most of the time your brow naturally begins here and there is no adjustment needed!

Arch: This is the highest point of the eyebrow and by holding a pencil from the edge of your nostril past the outer edge of your iris (the colored part of the eye) and up to the eyebrow you can pin point where the arch should be.

End of Eyebrow: The brow should end at the outer corner of your eye.

Katie

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I’m a skinny person and everyone says I’m anorexic when I’m not! I eat and I’m really healthy and I could live on salad! Anyway, I explained to them I was born two months early and I’m very small so I’m gonna be skinny but they don’t understand, What shall I do??

Laura, 13

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Dear Laura,

I had the exact same problem when I was younger! Everyone always thought I was too skinny, but I ate what ever I wanted, I just had a fast metabolism. I was also born early and have always been small. It sounds like you are really frustrated by what people are thinking.

And since you can’t change the way they think about you (maybe they are jealous and wish they were skinny too so they put you down…who knows) the only thing you can really change is your attitude. When they say “wow you are skinny” smile and say cheerfully “thanks!” like you are taking a compliment. Stay positive about it even when they are not and soon they will see that you are happy the way you are.

When you get defensive and upset by their comments, it only confirms their negative thoughts and they will think that they are right about you being anorexic. So don’t let them ruffle your features, be glad that you got a great metabolism because there are a lot of girls who have the opposite problem…they wish they WERE skinny like you.

Also, I’m glad I was able to shed some light on your period situation!

Katie

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“Hey!

I need some good advice… Every time I think of what I want to do in the future, I get a really sick feeling in my stomach, because I don’t know if I would have a chance in what I want to do. My heart belongs to singing and acting. When I see people, I put myself into their feet, and when I do, it’s like so amazing how much I could feel into their situations.

Everyone in my family know that I have an amazing strong voice, and they know that I love to pretend to be something else, but since I haven’t been showing as much of my compassion for a loooong time( since I was way young), I kinda feel like they don’t care, and don’t know what I am dreaming and chasing of. I have been through a lot the past four years in my life, including my insecurities, my mind, my family, and people around me. So when I think of having the future I dream of, I get that sick feeling in my stomach, like I am obviously not good enough. I guess it’s bad when I feel like I could throw up when I think of what I would hope to do in the future!!!?!!!

I am always the one, no one bothers looking at, and if they do, it’s like such a “what are you doing, and who cares about you.” So when I dream of what I want, I feel like it’s not possible because of feeling insecure. (like the looks that everyone gives me) Maybe if I were to audition for something sometime, I feel like I could sooo do it, because if I didn’t feel so insecure, and were more confident, they could just see the earthly, lively, strong sensibility in me!!!!!

I really need help on feeling confident on who I am, and I really need help about my mood changing drastically( even when I listen to music), And I also need help on how to not let people getaway with stepping right over me (mentally and definitely verbally, like things to say or do)

Thank you sooooo much for reading my long letter,lololololol”

~ Tamara, 14

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Dear Tamara,

You are definitely NOT alone in feeling this way. I have come to find that WE are our OWN worst enemy! And this is true with ALL people, myself included. Usually the person holding us back most from our dreams is ourselves! This may sound crazy but it is SO true! Think about it, ddoubting yourself is the only thing standing between you and your dreams! And YOU are the only one who can change that! “How?!” you might ask…well this is the tricky part. Its hard to just tell yourself to be confident and then you will be confident, it just doesn’t happen that way.

So start with baby steps. If you start telling yourself negative things such as, “I am not good enough” or “my family doesn’t believe in me” etc. try to realize that they are not true. That you are lying to yourself and start telling yourself how beautiful your voice is and that you ARE good enough. Tell yourself you can be a singer…and BELIEVE it! You believe yourself when you tell yourself those negative things, so why not try to believe that good things you tell yourself?! And if you don’t want to get any input from your family, in fear that they may give you negative feedback, then hold back from singing around them until you feel confident enough to not care what they think.

Confidence is not something that happens over night. So give yourself a break! No one else thinks of you the way you think of yourself. No one would even talk to you the way you talk to yourself. (and this is true with EVERYONE!) We are the most critical or ourselves than anyone else in the world! And being aware of this is the first step. That way when you start having these negative thoughts and insecurities you will know that it is not REAL and that you are being WAY to hard on yourself.

The truth is, you can be ANYTHING you want to be. You have a talent when it comes to singing and that is NOT a talent that most of people have. You have been BLESSED with a beautiful voice now EMBRACE it! Go join a choir or singing group and get back into it. You will find that when you sing you will feel that passion again.

Singing makes you happy….so SING your heart out!
xoxo

Katie

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Hi!

I met a boy at work, I really really liked him…when the summer job finished I did not see him again until a few weeks ago in a library, I saw him like four times and he always talks to me for a long while …in one of the conversations I recommended him a book, I said I was going to take it to the library, but didn’t see him again.

A few weeks later he wrote an email and said he would have liked to read that book, so i told him that I was going to the library those days, and asked him to tell me if he was going…but he did not answer.

I really like this guy, I’m thinking about asking him out…but wanna know but he didn’t replied, he is quite distracted…I don’t know what to do…I’d really thank some advice. Thnx”

~ Josefina

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Dear Josefina,

He emailed you about the book, so it sounds like he wanted to keep in contact with you. He could have easily just rented the book from the library without emailing you telling you he would have liked to read it.

Maybe he just doesn’t like hanging out in the library… you should suggest something outside of the library to do. Like mention a cool new movie and see if he wants to go see it or something.

xoxo

Katie

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“Hey I am 15 and I am getting into a serious relationship. All my friends including my boyfriend want to go out to the movies or bowling or something but my parents are so protective! I never get to go do anything like that and when I ask my mom just tells me I am to young to date or I can only go if she goes! I don’t want her to go because that would be embarrassing!

What should I do? I read in another question kind of like this that you said to earn their trust! I believe I have their trust because I never lie to them about where I am going or what I am doing (when I get to go)…

I think most of the reason that I can’t go is because of my boyfriend but I have told them nothing is going to happen between me and him there will not be any sex or anything like that! But they just don’t understand and think that things are the same as when they were my age! Can you help?”

~Haelee, 15

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Dear Haelee,

I can see that your parents really care about you and are trying to protect you from what they went through at your age…but as a 15 year old, that can be a real drag! So here is what you can try doing… Your mom said you can’t go out with him unless she goes, maybe she is just scared of the two of you being alone together.

So arrange a group outing like maybe have several of your friends all go to the movies together that way it is a group of friends and he can go along too. This way it is not like a “date” and is more just a hang out and get to know each other thing. Your mom might be more comfortable knowing that you will be with other people and not just one on one with him.

xoxo

Katie

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“Hey!

So I would really like some advice…I know it may sound a bit stupid! So new years eve I met this guy and like we both were kind of drunk and like we started making out, anyways we didn’t talk or anything after the party. Two weeks later I saw him again at my friends sweet 16 and he was telling his friends that he really likes me and that he is too shy to come to speak to me!

Then one of his friends pushed me on him and he smiled and after like two minutes we started kissing and then he was like I’ll meet you later I gotta go talk to my friends and he gave me this flirty smile lol like after his friend was like I need to talk to you and we went to the bathroom and he was there and then his mate went away. We talked for a bit, we started kissing and stuff! Anyways then his friends came and I went to mine…he came and told me we need to talk and he started saying I don’t know how to be a boyfriend and things like that and to get to know each other…I was like ok…then I had to leave and he gave me a kiss on the cheek.

Three days later he sent me a message from his mate’s moblie saying sorry for not texting and saying that he does not have credit and he’ll speek to me soon but he didn’t…it’s been like two weeks or so…what should I do? I really like him should I text him? Saying what? Please help!

xoxo Denise , 15

P.S. Sorry that its long! I’m maltese and he is english he just moved to malta a year ago and he going back in summer!”

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Dear Denise,

So it sounds like his phone doesn’t have any credit left, so maybe he can’t call you. If you text you wont know if his phone works or not or if he could actually receive your text. The only way to know for sure is to call his phone and see if it rings and if he answers.

If he doesn’t answer leave him a message and tell him you had a good time hanging out with him and that you wanna hang out again before he leaves back to England. Leave your number too just in case. After that if he is really into you and wants to get a hold of you he will find a way to call you back.

If he doesn’t call don’t take it personal, he may not have access to his voicemail. Next time exchange emails too =)

xoxo

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“Hi Katie,

My boyfriend asked if I still love him? What sould I do?

~Abby, 15

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Dear Abbey,

Your boyfriend is asking you if you still love him because he may have sensed a change in how you feel about him. You should really try and think about how you honestly feel about him…and if you really have to think hard to figure out if you love him, you probably arn’t in love.

And thats ok! So be honest with him and with yourself and if you don’t have the same feelings discuss it with him and try to find out why your feelings changed.

Either way, if you want to still be with your boyfriend try to be as open and honest with him about your feelings for him. He is asking because he wants to know, so don’t be shy about sharing your feelings.

But if you no longer want to be with him, now is the time to end it if you don’t have the same feelings for him as he does for you. And if you do end it, go easy on the guy and try not to crush his heart.

xoxo

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“Dear Katie,

How do I use a period pad and how do I tell my mum I started my period ?

please help me!” ~Laura, 14

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Dear Laura,

It is no secret that all girls get their period. I know that it can be a bit embarassing to bring up to your mother, but she is probably anticipating you to get your period since you are 14 now. Thats the same age I was when I got mine. Getting your period is exciting because it means you are becoming a woman…plus you get tol start wearing a bra too if you haven’t already!

Anyway, when using a pad, just peel off the side parts and line it up to your panty and stick on to hold tight. The box the pads come in usually have great visual instructions. Make sure to change periodically through out the day, depending on how heavy your flow is.

But you definetly should tell your mom right away…and just act excited when you tell her. I’m sure she will be glad and all women have it too so it’s not like you are weird or anything for having it!

“Hey! I’m almost sixteen my body changes have been up and down I’ve been getting pretty sick a lot lately and its affected my physical development a lot.

How do I cope with my insecurities when every girl my age is curvy yet help myself appear better.”

~ Steph, 15

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Dear Steph,

Yes, 16 can be a confusing age! Your body is going through so many changes it is hard not to get insecure about it. The best thing you can do is to embrace your curves and changes in your body, and not try to hide them. If you try to hide them by squishing down your boobs or wearing clothes that are too small or constrictive, it will only make your curves and boobs more obvious.

And you said you have been sick off and on, so I’m not sure what sickness you are referring to, but most of the time it wont interrupt your physical growth and development too much. If you continue to be concerned talk to your doctor about it and if there is anything he can do to help you develop properly.

So maybe it’s time for some new clothes that fit you better not that your body has changed. Since your sixteenth birthday is coming up, see if you mom will take you shopping for some cute bras and clothes that embrace your new beautiful body!?!

I hope this helps! Good luck sweetie!

xoxo

Katie

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“Hi Katie,

What do I do If I have a boyfriend that I like a lot, but also have an exboyfriend that I still like a lot?

Please write back :] thanks!!!!!!!”

~ Elizabeth, 13

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Dear Elizabeth,

Liking two guys at the same time is a good problem to have, lol! But it can be complicated. It happens a lot to people because they like one guy and connect with him but then they meet another guy they really connect with too! This is why people (guys and girls) end up cheating. Because they couldn’t make a choice to be with the person they are with…and end up liking two guys at once.

In your case here is what you should do. If you like them both the SAME…give your current boyfriend a chance and try to forget about your ex. Sometimes girls reminess about their past relationship and all the good times and start to remember why they liked that guy…they seem to forget about the reasons why they broke up. So remember that ex’s are ex’s for a reason, and you should try to remember why didn’t work out before, ask yourself why it might work a second time with him?

So here’s the thing, I’m sure you already know, but you need to make a decision. Decide which guy to like and put 100% effort into HIM. You said you really like your current boyfriend so stay with him and if it doesn’t work out you can always date your ex again!

xoxo

Katie

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Hi, I’m worried for my friend because she is only 15 and her boyfriend is 17-18? And he got his last girlfriend pregnant. I don’t understand why he’s interested in someone so young.

I don’t want to tell my friend what to do though or have her get mad at me for saying something. It’s also kind of weird talking to her on that level. I just don’t want the same thing happening to her.

~Corinne

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Dear Corinne,

I totally understand your concern for your friend. However, it is fairly common for guys to date girls a couple of years younger than them because girls tend to mature faster than guys, so don’t worry too much about why he is dating her.

So anyway, if you talk to your friend about this, just let her know your concerns with out putting her or her guy down. Like how you told me…just say because of what happened with his last girlfriend you are just concerned and don’t want to see her in that same predicament. If you approach the subject being a concerned friend that cares, there is no way she can get mad at you.

And if she doesn’t want to listen to your advice, thats OK…she is in control of her own life and can make her own decisions. Sometimes friends don’t make the best choices in life, but that doesn’t mean to stop being friends with them or put them down. Just stay a good friend like you are being and try to help when you can, and when it is out of your hands, just be there for her.

Plus, one way to look at it is since he already got his last girlfriend pregnant he is probably going to be A LOT more cautious now about getting any other girls pregnant! LOL!

xoxo

Katie

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“Hi Katie,

“I like this guy and his friends have asked him if he likes me and he says a little bit, yeah…But before they did when I texted him asking if he liked this other girl he is like a little bit and he kinda still likes me.

He says he doesn’t know who to date but he is leaning towards going out with her first because we will see each other more during lacrosse..And I told him I wasn’t going to just wait for him…and he said he doesn’t know for sure yet.

Then when I told my bff (whose a guy) like almost a week after it about it he asked him if he actually did like this girl and he said no..But my friend asked him like maybe a week after it all…So I don’t know!? This guy is also like really shy and acts so different around just me then he does when were with other people. My two girl bff’s say he is scared cause he has never had a girlfriend but I don’t know what to do..

Today in study hall he asked me if I was going to his game in Watertown at like noon. But I told him maybe and he said ok..But he like always stares at me and flirts(??),and punches me(that is good),I just don’t know for sure if he likes me or what…I really need help!!!”

~ Zendel, 13

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Dear Zendel,

Sounds like he likes you but doesn’t really know how to show it. Some guys can get really awkward when they are around girls they like and send mixed signals like this guy is doing to you. He asked you to come watch his game, so he is making some effort. Plus you say he is flirting with you.

So maybe try not asking him so directly “Do you like me?” Cause that is a blunt question that is hard for anyone to answer with out feeling really vulnerable after…ya know what I mean?! Like if a guy asked you, “Do you like me?” Would you be able to flat out say “Yes!’ even if you did really like him? I know I wouldn’t give a straight answer.

You should just keep hanging out with him, and when he invites you to go do something with him, GO! See where it leads, maybe once he gets to know you more he will open up more and not be so shy.

xoxo

Katie

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Dear Katie,

There is this boy named Austin and he is so sweet and we have hugged before but his bff hates me and I like Austin and I don’t know if he likes me, what should I do??

~ Morgan, 13

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Dear Morgan,

Well if you like Austin you should try to get along with his bff. If his best friend doesn’t like you, he may try to talk Austin into not liking you. So be nice to his bff and try to get on his good side. So be sweet and nice when you are around him…have you ever heard of the saying “kill him with kindness” ? Well it really does work! When you are being really nice (in a sincere way) it’s really hard for anyone to stay mad at you or not like you.

But overall, if you really like this guy and still can’t win his friend over, I guess it doesn’t really matter cause it’s Austin that you wanna date, not his friend! Just let Austin see that you are making an effort to get along with his friend, and will only make you look like a better person.

xoxo

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Hi Katie,

“What should I do about a guy I like that dosen’t like me?”

~Kayla

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Dear Kayla,

When you like a guy that doesn’t like you back it, the best thing is to leave him alone and focus on guys who like you back. I realize that it is hard sometimes, cause you really like him and can’t stop thinking about him. But if he has given you clear signals that he doesn’t like you then he will just be annoyed if you keep trying to pursue him and talk to him…and you don’t want to be annoying right?

So respect his decision and give him some space. Oh, and don’t get too down on yourself either, think about all the guys that have liked you that you didn’t like back cause there was not a mutual connection. It was not that they were bad guys, you just didn’t have the same feelings.

xoxo

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Hi Katie,

“I need to lose some weight before summer. I’m really active and play sports a lot but

It’s hard for me to get the weight off. I love junk food. Any tips?”

~Mary

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Dear Mary,

You can exercise as much as you want, but if you are still eating junk food you are going to have trouble loosing weight…you will most likely just maintain you current weight. The best thing to do would be to try and find healthier options rather than what you are currently eating.

Now this doesn’t mean that you have to live off of celery sticks and water. You can still have foods that taste good but that are better for you. Good tasting healthy foods that I love are fruit, frozen yogurt, spinach, string cheese, steamed veggies, herbal tea.

And let yourself have some naughty foods once in a while, that is just fine! As long as you don’t overindulge. The quantity you eat is the most important factor to monitor. Cause no matter what food you eat, if you eat a TON of it you will gain weight. So try not to obsess about calories and what the scale says. Try to just focus on nourishing your body and putting good foods in that will make you feel good about eating it.

Also let your mom know that you would like to get healthier and to stop buying junk food for the house so that you are not tempted.

Good luck sweetie!

xoxo

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Hi Katie,

I met Chris with the help of my friend, Angela, and after a while of getting over some other guy, I started to like him. I went to his house with his friends, and 2 of mine, and we had a lot of fun-we swam around in his pool, I beat his team of him and his friends up at racquetball, and he laughed at almost everything I said. His friends were nice to me, and it was probably the most favorite time of mine that I’ve hung out with him. I don’t remember much of it, sadly, but I remember playing rock band and just having an overall great time.

Another time, I partied with him at some other girls house, and I put ice down his back a bit, during an ice fight (which honestly, I bet he really hated, and it kinda showed), and swam around whenever he got in the pool-I had a pretty great time. We sat around on the outdoor couches by the pool, and we talked a bit, and then he decided to lay down on the burning hot (from the sun beating down on it), wrought iron coffee table, and covers himself with a towel. Naturally, I’m not content with talking to him through a blanket, so I ran over, grabbed a glass of lemonade, and laughing like a maniac, I went over and dumped it in the direction of his face. It was hilarious!

Last week, I went on a bike ride with my friend, Lana-the other best friend I go to school with-. We had a lot of fun, and acted like dorks. We stop by everybody that lived nearby (everybody we had the party with), and totally ruin our reputation, but we have some fun. Now, Chris lives right across from Lana, so we decide to stop by, but we have an argument on who should knock, talk, et cetera, but we end up being too giggly to make up our minds, and we head over to his house too fast. We knock, and his little sister races to the door to pick up. We giggle awkwardly, and I manage to choke out for her to get her brother, and she races off, and also much too fast, Chris comes to the door. We stutter and stammer and whatever else you aren’t supposed to do, and neither of us can say anything, and so we both start laughing super loudly and obnoxiously to kill the silence. We end up staring at each other, and I start fake-yelling at my friend to tell her we should have ditched faster. The whole experience is mortifyingly embarrassing. Throughout this, he is as depressed as ever, which makes up half of the awkwardness. Now, I’m sure he thinks for sure I am totally in love with him, and I’m not sure myself! We end up just awkwardly saying bye and running away as fast as we could, and I stick a popsicle down my friends shirt, I feel so horrified. Lana tells me that he never acts like this whenever they talk. Yikes.

You’re now up to date. Answer these questions, please; Do I like him? Maybe I do. What should I do? What would be smart? Why is he depressed, and why do I feel so bad? I don’t care if it’s not my fault; I feel bad for everyone, and I don’t care if he’s making me feel like I’m the cause of all this-it’s clearly not his intention to make me blame myself, but he doesn’t cover it up very well-if he was trying to in the first place. Tell me anything else you can, please, thanks, bye, I guess.

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Dear Gigi,

If you really liked this guy, you would not be asking if you do or not. It sounds like you just feel bad for him and don’t want to hurt his feelings. Maybe you like that he likes you and you don’t wanna reject him cause you would feel even worse.

And from his point of view he probably thinks you do not really like him because you and your friends are always playing and messing with him. I don’t think that he is depressed and if he is sad it is not you…maybe it is just that you are sending him mixed signals and he is just confused, he can’t tell if you like him or just like messing with him.

You wanna know what to do….I think you should just stay friends with him and maybe after you get more comfortable hanging out around him you might get less silly and be able to tell if you were getting butterflies around him because you liked him or cause you were just nervous about making him feel ok.

xoxo

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Hi Katie,

I haven’t started my periods yet, but when i put my finger up my vagina the other day, and when i took it out, there was some blood on it, i put a thin pad on as i thought it was my period starting. there was a bit of dark brown stuff on the pad when i went to the loo, and then for the next day i had like lightish brown discharge. I thought it may have been my period but i haven’t had anything since.

Please help, as i’m a bit concerned about it.

Thank you

George
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Dear George,

It sounds like you may have almost started your period. Sometimes in the begining that is what happens before you get your full blown period. If it went away, just monitor it, it is probably your body just getting ready for puberty. But if you keep getting unusual discharge you should tell your mom and have her take you to see a gynochologist.

xoxo

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