Hi Katie,

I really like this guy but he barely talks to me! How do I get his attention or at least for him to talk to me?

Mckenna, 12

Dear Mckenna,

First, you should try to hang out in places where he hangs out. This could be at the mall, movies, or at the skate park or baseball field if he plays sports. But whatever you do, don’t stalk him! Just SUBTLY try to make yourself available to talk to him in person.

Then take the initiative to start up a conversation with him. A good way is to ask him some simple questions at first, like if he can help explain something from class or asking him what time it is. Jokes are also a good ice breaker. Say a funny comment to him about something current and witty. Getting him to laugh will put him at ease so that the conversation flows better.

Next, take initiative to ask him out! You would be surprised by how many guys are too afraid to ask out a girl they’re interested in. They are just as shy as you! Take matters into your own hands. Walk up to him smiling and introduce yourself. You can say, “Hi! I’ve seen you around but never got the chance to introduce myself, I’m Mckenna!” Try not to bug him if he is really busy, but at the same time, don’t let the opportunity to talk pass you by just because you are too nervous.

A great way to start conversation is to start small talk. Comment on something he’s wearing or saying something about the place or event you’re both at. Try to get him to feel comfortable around you. And keep a friendly positive attitude and smile a lot! It’s hard for anyone not to wanna keep talking to someone who is friendly and happy.

You should also flirt with him! This can mean touching him lightly on the arm, for example, or laughing at his jokes. Just be playful and communicate that you’re interested. Compliment him! For example you could say something like, “I love your shoes!”
To keep the conversation rolling, ask him some questions about himself, like what he likes to do, what his favorite place to eat is, or if he likes to play sports. Try to see if you have anything in common with him. Now that you have found some stuff you both have in common, ask if he’d like to do it together sometime.

Hi Katie,

Okay there is this guy, I really like him and I think he likes me, and I really want to date him. I love him to pieces..he is the sweetest guy I have ever known. I told him my feelings when he was drunk and I told him everything and I ended up falling asleep next to him. I didnt have sex with him but I slept by him, and it was amazing it felt comforting. Please help!

Cassidy, 13

Dear Cassidy,

Hi sweetie! It sounds like you really like this guy and that everything is going great with him! Can you be more specific as to what your question/problem is? Did he not react the way you wanted him to when you told him your feelings? Let me know a little more details and I will help you best I can =)

Hey Katie,

I have this guy friend whom I’ve known since daycare, and we lost contact with each other for about 4 years. I’m now 15 and we got back into contact with each other a few months ago. We are trying to do the whole relationship thing. I was wondering, I’ve changed a lot in the past years and done a lot of things I regret, and I’ve changed that, but if I tell him, do you think he would react differently than someone I haven’t known as long?

Devyn Mykaela, 13

Dear Devyn Mykaela,

You don’t need to tell him anything that you don’t feel comfortable sharing with him. He does have a different perspective of you since he has known you longer, but that doesn’t mean that he will judge you any more than anyone else. In fact he may have a more lenient view of troubled times since he has known you since your innocent childhood days.

Just remember that whatever it was that you’ve done that you aren’t proud of, the important thing is that you’ve changed. Anyone would respect the fact that you had some troubled times and you corrected it and made your life better. That is admirer able. However you are not obligated to tell him anything about your past that you don’t want to.

So if you think he may not be able to handle it or understand what you went through, I would suggest just keeping it to yourself. Maybe later down the road when you guys get closer you will feel better about sharing that part of your life with him.

Dear Katie,

So I really like this guy… I’m pretty sure this is a typical thing…I really really like this boy in my class, and everybody says he likes me. (Everybody as in my friends and others in my class that know I like him). We’ve kept in touch over the summer and e-mailed each other like everyday. (He’s even invited me to his house a few times.)

Anyway, all of a sudden all his calls and e-mails have just stopped coming. He only sends me like chain letters and one-worded answers to questions if I ask any. I really wanna talk to him again but I don’t wanna seem desperate and don’t know what to say in an e-mail or on the phone! I just wanna know whats going on. Plz help. Thanks a bunch!

~Alexis, 13

P.S He’s known I like him ever since the 5th grade, I’m in 7th.

Dear Alexis,

There are SO many reasons why a guy just stops talking to a girl all of a sudden. He may have lost interest, met someone else or got really busy with something else…the list goes on and on. There is no point in you trying to figure it out in your own head. You may never really know exactly why he got distant so suddenly.

The only way to know for sure is to ask him directly, otherwise you need to let it go and just chalk it up to the unknown. Don’t try and assume that you know exactly why or create some crazy scenarios in your head of what you THINK may have happened. This will only get you feeling even worse. You don’t know the reason so don’t pretend you do. And it probably has NOTHING to do with you. Don’t start blaming yourself or thinking it is something you did. 99% of the time it is something HE is going through and has nothing to do with you personally.

This sort of thing happens to girls all the time, believe it or not! Guys just don’t want to be the ones to tell a girl they changed their minds for whatever reason. They would rather just avoid making a girl feel bad.

The least you can do is just try to talk to him like you always have and feel out the situation. If he still continues to blow you off, your best off just taking the hint and walking away so that you can move on and meet new boys. Don’t waste your time with a guy who doesn’t reciprocate your interest.

Hey Katie,

There is this guy that always says he likes me and I really like him. He always acts like he really likes me and stuff. But then the tells a lot of other girls the same thing. But when I got my step sister to text him from her phone and act like someone else he said he only liked me and this girl named Darian. But now he is flirting with my step sister too, still not even knowing who she is! Do you think he really likes me or he is just playing me?

Andrea, 13

Dear Andrea,

Yes, this guy likes you, but your obviously not the only one he likes either. It is possible to like several people at the same time or have a crush on more than one person. Which is perfectly fine. He may be just waiting to see which one of the girls will like him back. But if he continues to be that flirtatious with other girls while you are dating, than that means he is not serious about your relationship.

If you really like this guy than date him, keep in mind that he does tend to play the field and flirt with girls a lot. You have already seen that side of him, so be aware that if he does continue flirting than he may not be ready for a one on one commitment.

Dear Katie,

I really want to get over this boy. We’ve never gone out but we’ve liked each other for a while. He went out with a few other girls and kind of forgot about me. Then he started flirting with me and he sent a email that said,”I think your awesome” I don’t know if he’s starting to like me again?

Mackenzie, 13

When you are friends with a guy and you both kinda like each other, sometimes it is hard for one another to be sure that the other likes them back. For example, in your case, you say you have liked each other for a while but never actually gone out. He may have thought that you didn’t like him back as much as he liked you so he gave up and dated some other girls. But now he is realizing he still likes you.

You say you want to get over him, but it sounds like you still like him…you only want to get over him because you think that he is being a player. Before you assume that he is just a player, my suggestion would be to be more flirtatious and open with him about how much you like him so that he knows his feelings are reciprocated.

Now this doesn’t mean that you have to confess your love or anything, just make him see that you are interested and are into him too!

Hi Katie,

I just wanna know how do you know that boys like you.

Gabby, 14

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Dear Gabby,

Here are some sure signs that a boy likes you:

Does he look at you a lot? If you always catch him staring at you he might like you.

Does he overly flirt with you? Some boys will flirt with you a little for the fun of it, but the ones who flirt a lot are definitley interested.

Does he get nervous when he talks to you? Some guys get nervous when they are around girls they like. If he likes you he might start talking really fast or act weird or different when you come near him.

Does he try to make physical contact with you often? If he keeps trying to get close to you or tries to hold your hand, he likes you.

Does he ask you personal questions like if you ever had a boyfriend or if you are allowed to date boys?

Does he get upset if he sees you flirting with other boys?

Does he smile and laugh nervously at your jokes?

Does he always make up reasons to call you or hang out with you?

If you answered YES to more than one of these questions, then he definetly likes you!

Tips to Get Him To Like You:

Be yourself. Don’t start acting like someone else, because he may start to lose interest.

He might be looking at you while your not looking, so ask your friends if they ever see him looking at you.

If you know a boy likes you, try talking to him with a happy and positive attitude.
Compliment him. Just like girls, boys also like to be complemented!

Boys love pretty and well dressed girls. So always try to look your best when you know you will see him.

Be confident! Boys love a girl bursting with high self esteam.

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Dear Katie,

I have a problem with two guys. One guy lives in my neiborhood and the other guy I met at my house because my dad and my mom had a party. Their names are Eddie and Stevan. I really like them both but I have no idea if they like me back. And they are Spanish like me and they come to my house a lot.

Stevan (the one that I like) was showing off in front of me trying to impress me, but I was playing with my friends outside. Then they came outside and Eddie started showing off too. I don’t know if they like me for sure. And if they do like me, I have no I idea who I should choose. I need help please.

Gabby

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Dear Gabby,

From what you have said, it sounds like they both might like you. Sometimes it can be hard to tell if a guy really likes you or is just being friendly. You say they both come over a lot, are they there to see you or hang out at your parent’s parties? If they are coming over just to see you then they definitely like you.

Another sign is when Stevan was showing off (which guys do when they like a girl) it is quite possible that he was trying to impress you and your friends. And as far as you picking which guy to like, that is something you have to do for yourself. Which guy do you think about and like to hang out with and talk to better?

So over the next couple weeks, when they come over to your house, see which guy you feel more comfortable with and like to talk to and be around. This will help you decide which one you like best.

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