Hey Katie,

I really like a boy that I’ve known for seven years but he told my friend that he doesn’t like me even though everyone says he does. We’re always flirting and when my friend told him I liked him I pretended I didn’t know and he suddenly became wickedly nice to me.

I always catch him lookin at me but mostly when I’m laughing or smiling. We’ve held each others gaze tons of times. We go outside everyday and we text every night but I think he likes me although he says he doesn’t? How am I supposed to no please help me!

Rach, 15

Dear Rach,

Here are some signs that a boy likes you. Ask yourself these questions to find out if the guy you like does.

Does he look at you a lot? If you always catch him staring at you he might like you.

Does he overly flirt with you? Some boys will flirt with you a little for the fun of it, but the ones who flirt a lot are definitley interested.

Does he get nervous when he talks to you? Some guys get nervous when they are around girls they like. If he likes you he might start talking really fast or act weird or different when you come near him.

Does he try to make physical contact with you often? If he keeps trying to get close to you or tries to hold your hand, he likes you.

Does he ask you personal questions like if you ever had a boyfriend or if you are allowed to date boys?

Does he get upset if he sees you flirting with other boys?

Does he smile and laugh nervously at your jokes?

Does he always make up reasons to call you or hang out with you?

If you answered YES to more than two of these questions, then he definetly likes you!

Hi Katie,

Ok I went to a dance with this guy I like but then he had to leave early and then this other guy that was at the dance that I also like started dancing with me and from the looks of it, it looked like he likes me.

It’s been three days since then and he is always being so nice and flirty with me but I don’t know if he is just being friendly or is trying to give me a sign that he likes me. Please help.

~Shanna, 14

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Dear Shanna,

He totally likes you! Guys are really nice and flirty only when they are into a girl. It is very probable that both guys actually like you!

Guys wont approach a girl and dance with her if they don’t think shes attractive. So sounds like the guy that is still flirting with you is REALLY into you…so maybe the question you should be asking now is:

Do You Like Him Back?!

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“Hi Katie,
I mega like this guy and he will flirt but then when he is with his friends he acts like nothing happened. We have gone out before and it went really but he dumped me because he didn’t want a girlfriend over Christmas! grrr anyway…..

He likes my best friend and I have tried everything I can think of to get his attention, got any ideas??? Even his best friend has tired to convince him!! Should I just give up and take it he doesn’t like me???”

Laura, 13

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Dear Laura,

Sounds like you should move on. You can’t really MAKE anyone like you…and it sounds like he is not really worth your time and effort of trying to make him like you. You say he flirted with you and then acted like nothing happened…do you think you may have mistaken friendliness with flirting? This is common sometimes and can make it seem more complicated than it really is.

You also say that he likes you best mayte…then why are you trying to get his attention? Sounds like he is into your friend not you…so do yourself a favor and let him go. I’m sure there are other guys out there who would love to have you as a girlfriend….and those are the guys you want to put that kinda effort into! Trust me girl, it is no fun putting all that effort into someone who doesn’t appreciate it or want to return the same effort or feelings…it will only make you feel frustrated and sad.

Katie

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“Hi Katie,

“I like this guy and his friends have asked him if he likes me and he says a little bit, yeah…But before they did when I texted him asking if he liked this other girl he is like a little bit and he kinda still likes me.

He says he doesn’t know who to date but he is leaning towards going out with her first because we will see each other more during lacrosse..And I told him I wasn’t going to just wait for him…and he said he doesn’t know for sure yet.

Then when I told my bff (whose a guy) like almost a week after it about it he asked him if he actually did like this girl and he said no..But my friend asked him like maybe a week after it all…So I don’t know!? This guy is also like really shy and acts so different around just me then he does when were with other people. My two girl bff’s say he is scared cause he has never had a girlfriend but I don’t know what to do..

Today in study hall he asked me if I was going to his game in Watertown at like noon. But I told him maybe and he said ok..But he like always stares at me and flirts(??),and punches me(that is good),I just don’t know for sure if he likes me or what…I really need help!!!”

~ Zendel, 13

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Dear Zendel,

Sounds like he likes you but doesn’t really know how to show it. Some guys can get really awkward when they are around girls they like and send mixed signals like this guy is doing to you. He asked you to come watch his game, so he is making some effort. Plus you say he is flirting with you.

So maybe try not asking him so directly “Do you like me?” Cause that is a blunt question that is hard for anyone to answer with out feeling really vulnerable after…ya know what I mean?! Like if a guy asked you, “Do you like me?” Would you be able to flat out say “Yes!’ even if you did really like him? I know I wouldn’t give a straight answer.

You should just keep hanging out with him, and when he invites you to go do something with him, GO! See where it leads, maybe once he gets to know you more he will open up more and not be so shy.

xoxo

Katie

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Okay so there’s this boy I like and I think he likes me too because when were together he is so sweet and nice. But when he is around all his friends he is big headed. He has a girlfriend who is my friend and she dosn’t know that I like him…

But I am in love with him and it hurts to see them hugging. So a few questions… Why when he hugs and kisses her, why does he stare at me? What should i do about it? It’s realy depressing me help!!!

~ Francesca

Dear Francesca,

The fact of the matter is that he is taken. So if it hurts to see them hugging, try not to hang out with your friend when she is with him. But don’t tell her that you like him, there is no reason for that and it will only cause trouble in your friendship. So honor your friend and leave her boyfriend alone. Think about it from her point of view…if you were dating a guy you really liked and she liked him too, how would you want her to act?

Sometimes when a guy is taken he is more attractive than if he were single. Things are always more appealing when other people want them. So ask yourself if you like him because your friend likes him, or if you would like him if he were single.

And about him looking at you when they are hugging/kissing…I wouldn’t read to far into that…it could be that you are staring and he is just looking back. So the best thing to do, is if you are hanging out with your friend and she starts to kiss him, go talk to someone else or look away. It will only be torturing yourself if you stick around and watch them make out.

xoxo

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Hi! I just got to know this guy in my band class like two weeks ago. I randomly approached him and said, “I don’t know you, but hi!”

He smiled at me and gave me his name. Now ever since then when band class comes around we are always talking to each other. But now I just want to know what some signs are that he likes me and how can I give him signs that I like him?

~ JoJo, 15

Dear JoJo,

Continue to initiate conversations with him and be friendly towards him and fun to hang out with. You should see if he wants to practice outside of band class with you. It would be a good excuse for you to do something outside of school together one on one and see if sparks fly! Also, see if you have any other common interests.

To make sure you are sending signs that you do like him and so he doesn’t think you just want to be friends, here are a couple of things you can do… Compliment him, like tell him you like his outfit, or that he is a wonderful musician, or tell him he has a cute laugh….something that is not too deep, but is still flirtatious and shows that you are into him.

Another thing you can do is to casually touch his arm or hand when you are talking to him. Body language plays a huge role in communicating your interests….you don’t want to be too touchy, but a subtle touch here or there are clear signs that you are into him.

You will see in time if he reciprocates the same effort and feelings if he starts to return the flirtations with you and invite you to hang out with him.

xoxo

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