Hi Katie,

I’m 7 1/2 stone (which is 105 pounds). I don’t look OVER weight, just a little belly, but when people talk about weight I get all embarrassed. I do have big thighs though. I want to know what I’m supposed to do about this. Thanks !

Ellie, 12

Dear Ellie,

There is nothing you can do about what people are saying. You are feeling uncomfortable because you are probably not 100% satisfied with your weight. But try not to let their comments get to you. You are twelve and your body is developing and growing. It is OK to have a little extra weight right now, I don’t think you should start focusing on any diets at your age. If you start worrying about your weight now, you will obsess over it as you get older.

Give yourself a break, don’t get too down on yourself for what others are saying to you. Just eat what your body needs for nourishment. Don’t get into a habit of eating for comfort or out of boredom. This will only set you up for a habit that will be harder to break later in life.

If you are eating normal and getting a normal amount of physical activity for your age then you are fine…don’t stress. You are probably just maturing earlier than other girls and getting hips and thighs (which is perfectly normal). Have fun and enjoy being young…you’ll have all the time in the world when you are older to worry about stuff like this.

Hey Katie,

I really like this guy, but he is one of my best friends. So I finally got up the courage to tell him and he told me he doesn’t like me that way.

Now I feel awkward around him and I don’t know what to do! I feel like it was a huge mistake telling him because now we don’t even talk. What should I do?

Alli, 14

Dear Alli,

First, I would like to say that I think it was great that you had the courage to tell him how you feel! That takes a lot of confidence and courage. But now that he told you that he doesn’t share the same feelings you have to respect that. The only thing you can really do is accept his decision and try to continue as friends if that is what he wants too. Now that your feelings are out in the open, things between you can never go back to exactly how it was before. It’s different now, but that’s ok. Because before you secretly liked him and hoped he would like you back, and now you can stop wondering.

So try not to wish that everything would go back to how it was, because there is no way to go back in time…what happened, happened. If he doesn’t want to talk to you, you have to respect that and give him his space. Don’t force your friendship onto him…he is just as confused as you are right now. Think about it this way, if you had never said anything and then you would have never known his real feelings. You would look back and regret not telling him how you felt, and wonder if he would have felt the same. So that is great that you were able to overcome the fear of rejection and express your feelings.

Finding out the truth and knowing for sure is almost always better than not knowing and wondering what would have happened if you had only told him. So be glad that you don’t have to live with regret! And please try not to let this experience stop you from being open with your feelings next time you like a guy. Maybe the next guy will share your feelings and you will forget all about this one!

Hey Katie,

So me and this guy have been talking for about three weeks. He has a reputation for playing girls, but as always, I didn’t listen to any of the things people were telling me.

In school he and I always hang out together and a lot of people think he is my boyfriend cause they see us together, but he is not. Last night I went on his Myspace page and saw that he was talking to some other girl on the phone that night. He also never called me last night because he was talking to the other girl on the phone.

This isn’t the first time that he’s done something like this. I realize that I’m not his girlfriend but it still bothers me when he talks to other girls especially since he’s always saying how special and important I am to him. So my question is am I over-reacting or should it be bothering me? And what do I do about it?

Chelsea, 15

Dear Chelsea,

There is really not much you can do about him talking to other girls since you are not his girlfriend. You are still getting to know each other and it is probably not a good idea to say anything about it to him at this point. I think what is bothering you most is what other people are saying about him. You hear people talk about him being a player, and it seems like although you don’t want them to be right, part of you is just waiting for them to be right and for him to “play” you.

Stop looking at his myspace. When you only see partial conversations things can be extremely misinterpreted. I have guy friends that say stuff to me sometimes that if my boyfriend read he could easily get jealous and assume it meant something else when it means absolutely nothing. You are going to drive yourself crazy by going on his Myspace and looking at the girls he is talking to and their conversations. You are not seeing the whole picture and are assuming that he is having flirty conversations with other girls and it only upsetting you.

Since it sounds like you want to have more with him, just give him the opportunity to show you that he is into you and get to know him better. If you show him a jealous side of yourself right from the start and get upset that he is talking to other girls, he is going to get scared away and think that you are a jealous girl…no guy likes that because he will think that it will only get worse if you are actually his girlfriend.

“Hi! Should I be worried because I didnt get my period yet? And I’m almost going to be 13 soon and I need some advice!”

~ Heather, 12

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Dear Heather,

Do not worry sweetie! That is perfectly normal! I did not get my period until I was 14! Some girls start earler than others, but it does not mean anything if you start later than other girls. I was really active and skinny which I have learned can make you start your period at a later age than girls who are heavier. Girls who have a lot of body fat will often start their period at a much younger age…such as 11 and 12. So don’t worry one bit! You are perfectly healthy and will start your period within the next few years! And trust me, when you do you will wish it had gone longer without it, lol!

xoxo

Katie

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